In The Dark
by caro-in-fictionland
Summary: Aurora Kirkson is hearing voices and seeing breaks in reality... but is it reality at all?


**Part One**

_They're closing in on me; Sam and Dean are nowhere to be seen. One of the demons lurches forward and throws me into the wall. I yell; I'm seeing through a veil of red, and what I can see is moving too fast for my brain to process. I probably have a concussion but that's pretty low on my list of concerns at the moment. _

_"AURORA!" I hear someone yell, I think it's Dean... Or maybe Sam, I can't tell._

_The demon walks towards me again. "This is where I die." I think hopelessly as I close my eyes. My knife is way out of reach, and Sam and Dean are both being surrounded by demons as well._

_"Do it! Kill me you cowardly dick!" I yell at the demon. Others are just standing there, watching it all go down, with sick smiles on their faces._

_The demon stops in front of me, smiles a malicious grin, and the last thing I see is a fist coming towards my face._

I jolt awake, breathing quickly. The dreams are getting worse. I think, still recovering from the nightmare. The dreams have been happening more frequently, and are more vivid each night. I've been having strange days. And the dreams feel pretty dumb; I don't even know the people I keep seeing. That's really weird. I look at the clock on the wall, it's 5am but I'm wide awake. Might as well get up now. I decide as I get up off the couch. I decided to wait a year between high school and college. That year turned into three years very quickly. I was never an academic person really, so here I am, sleeping on a friend's couch, before I get on a train this afternoon. When I was a teenager, I was so horribly restless staying in the same town and going to the same places every single day. So now I travel, I have a well-paying job, well enough to take the train somewhere every few months. I work at a bookstore, all they needed to hire me was my English grade average.

I grab my backpack, and go out the door. I live in a small-ish town, but we do have some chain stores. One of which is a Dunkin' Donuts, which is open pretty much all night. I get in my car, it's a beat-up Chevy Shitbox as I like to call it. It takes me a few tries to start it, and I check myself in the mirror. I look like I just lost a bar fight. I didn't bother putting on any makeup, I didn't brush my hair, and there's blue under my eyes from lack of sleep. It's winter so I turn the heat up a bit, not too much though cause I need to be used to the cold. I'm taking the train to a northern Ontario town. I've always wanted to see the northern lights that my parents named me for and there's going to be a magnetic storm tomorrow. I always get excited for trips but this one is really important to me. Ever since I was a kid I've wished I could see them. The Aurora Borealis, I've been hearing that name since I was a toddler. My name is actually Aurora Kirkson, my friends all call me Ror though. I pull into a spot in the DD parking lot and get out of the car. The place is empty but I've gotten to know the employees who work at this early hour. Charlie is the one who's working today; I would actually call her my friend. We text sometimes and since I've been getting the dreams I've been coming in at the same time every single day we talk a lot.

"Hey Ror, the usual?" she asks as I walk in.

"You know it Char!"

Charlie is really short, she has blond hair, and really dark brown eyes. She has an almost unusual appearance. Not ugly, in fact guys flirt with her every day, just not normal. I'm pretty much the exact opposite in looks, I have long really dark brown hair, and I have weird eyes. I have one blue eye, and one green. I get a lot of weird looks sometimes and people either ask about it or avoid asking about it. Anyway, I'm also about a foot taller than her. She hands me my coffee with a triple shot of espresso and I lean against the counter.

"So, excited for the trip?" she asks, still fiddling around in the cash register.

"Definitely, now I finally get to see why my parents gave me such an odd name." I reply, laughing because I already know what she'll say.

"They gave you an odd name because you're an odd person."

I was right!

"Yeah I suppose that might be why." I say sarcastically.

"Oh you know it is weirdo!" She teases and closes the register.

_Wake up._

"Did you say something?" I ask.

"Nope, maybe you're going craaaazy!" she says wiggling her fingers at me.

"Going?" I say, pretending to be confused.

"Nah you're right, you're already there."

We talked about random stuff, she just got a new girlfriend who is "absolutely worth the drama." apparently her family doesn't approve of Charlie.

_Please you have to hear me._

I zone out, trying to hear the voice more, but it's gone already.

"You listening?" Charlie says, waving a hand in front of my eyes.

"Yeah sorry, the dreams were really vivid last night." I say apologetically.

"That's okay I was just rambling anyway." she says, smiling.

I look at the time on my phone; we've been talking a while now.

"Can I get another coffee? Jo will kill me if I forget to bring her one."

"Sure coming right up!" she says.

I pay and she hands me the coffee.

"I'll see ya when I get back okay?"

"Alright have fun seeing the auroras Aurora!" she replies, laughing at the way it sounds.

I leave and get back into what I generously call a car, and head back to Jo's house. When I get there it's 7am and she's already awake, so I put her coffee down in front of her. She's too busy watching cartoons to notice. Yes my twenty-three year old friend and I still love cartoons.

"Dude, coffee." is all I say as I sit down next to her.

"Thanks Ror." she says absent-mindedly as she stares at the tv. The show goes to commercial, she asks "Wake up scary early again?"

"Yeah maybe. The dreams keep getting more vivid." I say, remembering them as clear as a memory, rather than a memory of a dream.

"You've always had a wild imagination, remember that story you wrote in grade eleven? The one about the vampire nests?" she asks, bringing up a very old English project.

"Yeah I'm still pretty proud of that one." I state, grinning.

"So, when do you need to be at the train station?" Jo asks, looking back to the TV.

"Three o'clock, can you drive me?"

"Yeah sure, I'm off work today anyway."

"Awesome! Thanks!" I say as the show comes back on.

I go over to the closet where I keep my things and start packing them into my backpack. Something is poking at the back of my mind. I haven't told anyone, but something is really wrong with my memory. I can remember certain little details but everything I remember feels fabricated. The story Jo brought up was from a while ago but I do remember the story. I don't remember writing it, and I don't remember school at all. The story rings clear in my head as though I was there in it, but I sincerely don't remember the assignment, the teacher, the class, or the school. I don't know much about memories but I know that's not how they work. It's only 10am when I'm done packing, so I decide to go to Novel Ideas, the bookstore I work at to pick up a book to read on the train. Jo's apartment is only a couple blocks away from there so I decide to walk.

"See ya in a bit Jo, I need some books!"

"Alright but don't forget be here by 2:30." she calls to me as walk out the door.

I walk down the stairs of the town house, and walk out the front door. The streets are still quiet, one of the only reasons I like living in a small town. Novel Ideas is almost always empty, minus about five regulars who come in every other day. Ellen is my boss, she's one of those people who's really old fashioned and nice. She has shoulder length gray hair, she's a few inches taller than me, and she always wears bright colours.

"Hello Aurora." she says politely.

"Hi Ellen, how're things?"

"Good, good. I suppose you're looking for something to read on your trip?" she asks, placing a book onto a shelf.

"Yeah, any recommendations?"

"Well there are a few..." she says trailing off, scanning the shelves.

She grabs a few and I look them over, picking a fantasy/adventure book. I decide to read a few chapters from it before I buy it. The story is about an angel rebelling against heaven to help his human friends; I'm only a chapter into it when I know I want to read it all. I don't know why, but the story seems familiar.

_Ror. Snap out of it._

I shake my head, trying to somehow erase the voice as though it's a picture on an etch-a-sketch. The voice sounded so desperate and intense. Wait a second. I think suddenly. That's one of the voices in my dreams. This revelation makes me nearly out of my chair; so I get up and walk to the cash where Ellen is.

"I definitely want to read this one." I say a little too enthusiastically, handing the book and money to her.

She gives me a weird look, puts the money in the register and says, "Alright well I hope you have fun on your trip!"

"Thanks Ellen I'll be in for work the day I get back!" I say as I walk out the door.

I look at my phone, it's almost 2:30, so I walk quickly back to Jo's. By the time I get there, it's time to leave again. The drive is about twenty minutes, as the train station is two towns over. Jo blasts a classic rock station, and we drive in silence. When we reach the station she hugs me goodbye and drives away.

The train is already boarding, so I hand my ticket to the person standing outside the train and get on.

_I'll go get her if I have to._

This voice is calm, collected, and unfamiliar. Not one of the ones I heard before.

"Miss, did you hear me?" a steward asks.

"I'm sorry, I was lost in thought." I say apologetically.

"Your seat is this way." he says, gesturing to a booth enclosed by doors.

"Thank you!" I say as I step past him and open the door.

There are two benches facing each other, I laugh because it resembles the Hogwarts Express for a minute. There's no one else here, so I sit down on the bench to the right and look out the window. There's a field parallel to the station so all there is to see is green grass.

_If you're going to do it, do it now. Who knows what she's seeing._

It's one of the voices I know this time. What the hell is that supposed to mean? I think, not really surprised to hear the voice. If I'm going insane, I am going to see the northern lights first. I think, determined to ignore the strange, familiar voices.

"We will now be leaving the station, we cross the border into Canada in two hours." a voice states over the PA system.

I pull out the book I bought; it's called The Heavenly Rebellion. As I keep reading, a feeling of tightness grows in my stomach. The story seems so familiar; I must've read it when I was younger. I put the book down, trying to empty my mind so I can stop worrying. I stare out the window, unable to stop my mind from going around in circles.

Suddenly, the door is thrown open and a man rushes in.

"Aurora, come on let's go."

I just sit there staring, trying to process what just happened.

"Aurora! You need to wake up, if you don't you'll die." he says calmly, gesturing for me to come to him.

"I'm sorry, who are you?" I ask, trying to understand what's happening.

"What do you mean?" he asks, a shocked look erasing the serious look on his face. Then suddenly, a look of realization gets rid of the shock. "You don't remember."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I say, getting more confused by the second.

"This isn't real Aurora. This is a dream. You've been in a coma for over a week."

"Very funny. What do you want from me?" I ask irritably.

"You think I'm lying." he states, studying me.

"Either that or I've gone completely insane." I say calmly.

"No. Both are wrong. This is not your life. Try to remember something, something specific."

This is too weird, he's right of course but what's happening?

"Please just take my hand, I'll take you back to reality." he says, holding out his hand.

In a moment of doubt, and possible insanity, I stand up, and he grabs my hand.

**Part Two**

When I open my eyes I'm blinded by bright lights. What happened? Where the hell am I?! I think panicking. I jump up into a sitting position, everything spins and I almost fall back down.

"Whoa easy Ror!" someone says grabbing my shoulders.

A guy stands in front of the bed; he has shoulder length brown hair and grey/brown eyes.

I jump back in shock, I recognize his voice. It was in my dreams every night.

"Who are you? What's happening?" I ask, getting more and more panicked.

"What are you talking about Ror?" he asks looking hurt.

"She doesn't remember her life." the man from the train says to him.

"Can't you do something Cas?" the guy with the long hair asks.

"I can but I can't give her memories back all at once, it would be too much for her. Not to mention that in my weakened state, restoring it all at once might kill me." he explains.

"So, what you're just going to put the pieces back together one by one?"

"Yes, in a way I suppose that's what I will have to do."

I just sit there watching them talk. The man from the train is wearing a tan trench coat, and the man with the longish hair is kinda really big. I don't know how his head isn't hitting the ceiling. I calculate my chances of escaping while they're in the room. Chances are not in my favor as they are both standing between me and the door. I don't know where I am, who they are, or why the hell I'm not on a train to see the northern lights. But I am out of here the minute I get the chance. Just when I think that, another guy bursts through the door.

"Guys, we got a problem." he says and rushes back out the door.

"Stay here Ror we'll be right back!" the tall one says before rushing out of the room with the trench coat guy.

The minute they're out of the room I look for something to replace the hospital robe. There's a pile of clothes that I guess are mine so I throw them on as quickly as possible as the room spins around me and my head aches. Blue jeans, a red V-neck, and a black hoodie. Yup, definitely mine. I think heading for the door. I open it quietly and look down the hall. There's no one so I look at the signs and head in the direction of the stairs. I keep a fast walk through a door and down the stairs. Of course when I get outside it's raining really hard. I look a little ways away, there's a restaurant a few buildings away. I figure I'll go there so I can ask someone where I can find a bus terminal; I need to get as far away from here as possible. I'm halfway across the parking lot between me and the road when someone comes out from behind a car and stops about five feet in front of me. I keep walking but the man just blocks my path wherever I go.

"I'm sorry, can I help you?" I ask politely.

The man just sneers at me.

"Are you lost Aurora?" he asks in an acidic tone.

"Look, I don't know who you are I'm just trying to get home." I reply and try to get past him.

Suddenly the man lurches forward and punches me in the stomach. I fall over, my head swimming even more than before. He pulls me back up and punches me in the face. He throws me down on the ground, into a puddle, and pulls out a knife. Then he's gone and I hear a strangled yell. My brain is obviously sick of being awake, as the world is slowly fading to black. The last thing I see is the tall guy crouched over me, trying to talk to me.

"Aurora."

**Part three**

"Cas is she okay? She's been asleep for a while." I hear someone say anxiously.

"She's fine Sam, she needs her rest."

"Yeah come on Sammy this is Ror we're talking about. She's strong, she wouldn't quit on us for anything." the guy from earlier at the hospital says.

No one says anything for a minute so I sit up, the tall guy... Sam I guess, jumps up off the couch and comes over. The guy in the trench coat I guess is Cas, he gets up as well.

"Hold out your hand." Cas says reaching for me.

I lean back a bit.

"Not until you tell me WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON." I say forcefully, glaring at him.

"That's what I'm trying to do." he says as he grabs my hand.

I see pictures in my head, of Charlie, Jo, and Ellen, but they're changing into other people.

"Your friends are not a fabrication; you knew Ellen and Jo very well when you first started hunting. You met Charlie very recently." I hear Cas say but I don't see him. I see pictures of my family, a silent memory of some of the dreams I had. "We can only hope that in restoring the more memorable events, that you might remember the rest on your own.

"The story you thought you wrote about the vampires, that isn't a story, it's a memory. The book you were reading on the train, is also a memory, I am Castiel." I see pictures of the two other guys in my head. "And that's Sam and Dean. You've known them for a long time. Obviously the memories you're missing aren't your childhood memories, those are still intact. You are missing approximately eight years."

He pulls his hand away and I'm thrown back into reality. Sam and Dean are both looking at me expectantly.

"Do you want me to restore your memories?" Castiel asks, holding his hand back out.

"Yes." I say, but Dean whispers in Cas' ear.

"That's probably a good idea." I hear Cas reply.

He grabs my hand and I'm thrown into a memory.

_"You took care of a vampire nest without any help?" _

_"Yeah I did. Don't sound so surprised."_

_The guy chuckles._

_"I'm Sam. That's my brother Dean."_

_"I'm Aurora. I would say it's a pleasure but I'm soaked in blood so nothing is a pleasure right now." I say shaking his hand._

_"Hey Sammy! Time to go!" Dean yells from the car._

_"Give me a minute Dean!" he yells back before turning to me, "So who taught you how to hunt?" he asks. He resembles a curious puppy at the moment._

_"A few people, Bobby Singer, Ellen Harvelle, I was friends with Jo her daughter."_

_"Oh you knew Ellen and Jo?" he asks._

_"Yeah have you talked to them lately?" I ask, "I couldn't reach their number."_

_He looks down for a second. Before talking again, "No they umm... They both died a few years ago. And Bobby also died recently."_

_That hits me like a slap to the face. I can't believe it._

_"But why didn't their phone number work?" I ask, I tried to call them a lot._

_"The Roadhouse burned down."_

_"Wait so Ash is gone too?" _

_"Yes. I'm sorry."_

_"Sammy come on! Stop flirting we need to go!" Dean calls from what looks like a late 60s Impala._

_"Well as much fun as this day has been, looks like you need to leave." I say smiling weakly._

_"Yeah I guess so. Well I hope I see you again soon." _

_"Yeah I hope so too."_

Suddenly, I'm yanked out of the memory, and I'm back in the motel room.

"What did he show you?" Sam asks, looking intently at me.

"It was when I first met you two." I say, thinking about the memory. There's a weird mixed up feeling in it that I can't figure out.

"Oh right I remember that!" Dean says, "You took out a vamp nest before we got there!"

"Of course you remember, Dean. You were irritated for days that someone killed things and you didn't get to." Sam says chuckling.

A small smile tugs at one side of my mouth but I hide it well. Or at least I think I did, I might be wrong cause Sam is grinning at me.

**Part Four**

The next few days involved driving around, apparently they... I mean "we" I guess, were tracking down a demon and that's how I wound up in a coma. I'm sitting in the back of the Impala. Cas didn't come with us cause he can just teleport or something; angel talents I don't really understand.

"Why are you going to so much trouble to find a specific demon?" I ask Dean.

He and Sam exchange a glance.

"No reason," Dean says, "We just need him for information."

I know he's lying, but I don't say anything. I need to trust them, I know I do. He pulls over into a motel parking lot. We all go inside and Sam talks to the guy at the counter.

"One room, two beds." he says.

Dean punches his arm.

"Sorry I meant three beds."

What was that all about? I wonder but shake it off as they gesture for me to come with them to the room.

"Just a sec I gotta grab something." Sam says, going back out to the parking lot.

The room is almost exactly the same as the one we were in before. Dean claims one of the beds and I sit down on the last one over, leaving the middle bed for Sam; who comes into the room carrying a blue backpack.

"Here. It's your things." he says handing the backpack to me.

I open it to see what I have. An iPod classic, two cell phones, and a copy of To Kill A Mockingbird. That's only in the smaller front pocket, in the main pocket there are clothes, toiletries, and at the bottom, a Beatles CD and a leather-string necklace with a little gold face on it. I leave everything in the bag, not really in the mood to look at what are essentially a stranger's personal belongings. I set the bag down on the bed and turn to go outside for some air. Suddenly Cas is right in front of me. I jump back and nearly fall over.

"Hey Cas." Sam and Dean say in unison.

"Hello." he says, "We need to restore your memories faster than planned."

"Why?" I ask confusedly.

"He's looking for you, as you are looking for him." is all he says, and it sure as hell does not make me understand what's happening.

"What are you talking about?"

"That demon from the hospital lot, he got a message to THE demon before he ambushed you. You need to remember why we're tracking him."

"Cas you can't give her THAT memory now." Sam says suddenly.

"We don't have a choice. She needs to know in the next few days."

"Well keep going with the missing memories but save that one for last."

I don't ask them what they're talking about; they probably wouldn't tell me if I asked.

"Aurora are you ready for more of your past?" Cas asks me holding out his hand.

I don't say anything, I just nod and put my hand in his.

The memories come back in flashes of voices and pictures, but once I've seen part of it I start remembering more

_"Ah come on, have a little fun!" accompanied by Sam with a very joyful expression on his face, gesturing to an air hockey table in a bar, Dean looking intently at Cas who was apparently trying to solve a Rubik's Cube._

_"It's not worth it." with Dean pulling me away from a demon tied to a chair as Sam keeps cutting him with a demon blade. "Where is he!" Sam yells at him._

Then a very vivid, complete memory comes to mind.

_"Please understand? I can't stay here. I can't keep getting attached to people. It never ends well for anyone." _

_"You've been with us for nearly two years. Why now?" Sam asks with a shocked look on his face._

_"I just can't okay?! I need to finish what I started." _

_"Look you don't have to do this alone! I know the hunter life sucks, I know! But when you find people you can be with happily you have to hold onto that! You can't just quit because you're afraid!" he says, never breaking eye contact with me._

_He can't know, he can't know the real reason. Falling in love is one problem, but falling in love with a hunter? Bad idea. Worst idea, in fact, that I have ever had. Especially while I'm busy hunting down a murderous demon._

_"Look, just sleep on it okay? If you still want to leave in the morning, then leave." he says the last two words as though they cause him pain._

_"Okay." I say, though even that almost feels like a lie._

_An hour after he falls asleep, I write a letter._

_Dear Sam,_

_I'm really sorry I have to do this, but I can't say this to your face. And I can't stay or it'll only get worse, and someone will get hurt, or killed, or God knows what. So I'm going to track down the demon alone, I might find you, Dean, and Cas again after that but I need to go now._

_-Aurora_

_I put it on the pillow next to his head and walk out the door. I walk a few blocks and find a bus terminal. It's only about two in the morning and it's closed, so I sit on a bench and wait. I'm half asleep when someone comes rushing over._

_"Aurora, just hear me out. You're a part of the screwed up family now. Dean, Cas, Charlie, Kevin, me. And I'm not going to let you go on a demon hunt alone. Not this hunt. You'll get killed."_

_"I don't want anyone else getting killed because of me ever again."_

_"It won't be your fault if I die or if Dean dies. Hell, me and Dean have both been dead before, we know exactly what we're getting into." _

_I just nod. He makes a valid point and I didn't want to leave them anyway. I wasn't expecting Sam to wake up at two in the morning and come after me though._

_I also didn't expect him to kiss me. And I didn't expect me to kiss him back. There was urgency to it, and tenderness - as horribly corny as that sounds. Then he pulls me into a hug._

_"By the way I think I'm in love with you." he blurts out quickly, almost like it was an accident._

_"I think I'm in love with you too."_

_HONK HONK! A car honks its horn and we jump apart. It's Dean, he rolls down a window and yells,_

_"It's about damn time!"_

**Part Five**

The next two days are spent giving me back minor memories. A few demon interrogations, re-learning in general, hanging out in bars, doing research. But none of it gives the snowball effect of memories that Cas hopes for. Sam looks increasingly anxious the more memories I get back. There's something he doesn't want me to remember, which probably means I should be getting anxious too, but I really would like to remember the past eight years. I ask about my family sometimes, but no one ever answers, so I'm assuming I ran away or something. Didn't tell them anything, yeah that sounds like something I might do.

"We have to give her the memory now." Cas says forcefully, an hour after giving me a memory of a fairly uneventful ghost hunt.

I look uncertainly at Sam, then Dean who took his attention off assembling his gun, then back at Cas. Sam gets up and sits down next to me.

"Does it have to be now?" Sam asks.

"Yes, we have been putting it off, and I understand why, but this memory is a crucial part of her past." Cas replies, grabbing my hand carefully.

_It's a normal day, school is boring, people are assholes. The usual. I'm fifteen, who's happy at fifteen? When I get home, something doesn't feel right. It smells of sulfur, and the house is eerily silent. Then wind noise and black smoke coming straight at me. The weirdest part is that I can hear this thing's thoughts. It's a demon, and it is possessing me, and it is going to do terrible things. The demon makes me black out for a minute. Then I can see again. I no longer have the ability to move, the demon moves my body, against my will, towards the kitchen. My mom, dad, and two younger siblings are tied up on the floor._

_"ROR PLEASE DON'T DO THIS." Jane, my eight year old sister screams._

_The demon walks towards her and slits her throat. Cade, my six year old brother screams as do my parents. I want to fight back and stop this, I want to close my eyes and put my hands over my ears but I can't. And the demon is smiling a sick twisted smile with MY mouth, and is killing my family with MY hands. And there is nothing I can do about it; my internal fight doesn't even slow the demon down. I try to block out what I'm seeing as he kills the rest of them but I can't. And as quickly as he possessed me, he left. And I was left sitting in a pool of my family's blood. I know what I have to do, I know I'm not crazy, I remember a friend of the family came over once. He told me that if a monster ever did anything to us, to come see him. So I set fire to the kitchen, and I leave._

_Not much of a normal day anymore._

I feel Cas pull his hand away, but the memories keep coming. In absolutely no order. My birthday last year, Sam giving me the necklace Dean giving me Dark Abbey Road by The Beatles. Cas gave me To Kill A Mockingbird because I told him it was my favorite book and I forgot to take it with me before I burned down my house. Accidentally walking in on Dean while he was "surfing the web" because he wasn't used to me being there. Sam telling me he loved me. Over and over again, him saying it, me saying it back. Meeting Charlie, Ellen teaching me and Jo basic school stuff we had to miss out on. Bobby teaching me the basics of hunting until I went off on my own to learn to be the best. Oh and as it turns out, I had sex with Sam Winchester. Go figure. The times when I'd joined with Sam and Dean when I first started hunting the demon who killed my family. I hadn't told them anything about it, I snuck off a lot to do research until I finally told them. That wasn't a fun day. Also, apparently, I HAVE seen the northern lights. There was a case up north, waaaaay up north so we went. And they were breath taking. The time I decided I could face the demon alone, so I left Sam, Dean and Cas, and went to where I found him. Before I'd gone into the building I got a call from Dean.

"Are you insane?!" the words ring around in my head.

I wanted to finish it quick so I went in, knowing they were on their way. It took me long enough to find the demon that Sam and Dean were on their way inside the warehouse. What I didn't know was that the demon had lots of friends. And we were ambushed. That problem was what ended with me in a coma, living my life as it would have been, had my family lived.

It felt like a long time going through every memory but it was barely two minutes. Sam looks so worried it hurts, Dean looks like he's intent on not looking worried, and Cas just looks sad. In the past week, I woke up from a coma I didn't know I was in, got attacked by a demon, remembered every painful detail of my past, and now we get to go after a very angry demon. On the plus side I love Sam and he loves me. My God this family is weird, I have adopted Cas and Dean as my brothers. And we get to go kill the son of a bitch who killed my family for fun. I'm not sure what expression I have on my face, I think it's been frozen on shock and loss since the first memory.

I get up and walk outside, no one gets up to stop me. When I get outside it's cold, but I just sit down on the grass patch next to the motel. I then proceed to do what any slightly sane human being would do, I scream into my hands and start crying. I hear a door open and close, Sam is next to me in seconds. He throws the blanket around my shoulders and puts his arms around me. He is literally my shoulder to cry on for around twenty minutes.

"Do you remember everything? Did you get all eight years back?" he asks quietly, letting me sit back up straight again.

"Yeah," I say smiling a little, "Everything."

He kisses me, I realize that I feel different about everything but I still feel the same about him. And I am going keep him alive, no matter what happens.

Tracking. Always tracking. That cowardly sonofabitch demon is hiding himself fairly well. Now that I remember everything, I've started noticing things more. Like how Dean's eyes light up when Cas shows up, how he watches him a lot, how Cas does the same. I almost laughed my ass off when Cas showed up when Dean wasn't wearing a shirt. Sam joked that Cas knew Dean was half naked and that's why he showed up. From the look on his face, Sam also noticed the things I did. This kind of observation is the only thing keeping me feeling like a normal human being. We're starting to get closer to the demon, and I'm not scared. Not even a little bit; I'm just violently angry. We pull off to another motel; it's late and we don't have an exact location yet. We get a room with two beds - before you start thinking dirty thoughts, I sleep in the same bed as Sam but no dirty things happen - I go to sit on the bed and read To Kill A Mockingbird. Sam and Dean are at a bar a few buildings down, they invited me but I'm not in the mood to drink. I eventually feel myself drifting off to sleep so I put the book down and graciously accept the rest.

**Part Six**

I hear the door open violently. I roll gracefully off the bed onto the floor to hide. But they've already seen me so I grab my knife. They waste no time, they calculatedly run toward me. I jump up onto the bed then off, bolting for the nearest demon, knife poised, ready to strike. I don't hear another one come up behind me until it's too late. My knife is ripped from my hands and they pull a bag over my head and tie my hands before I can even blink. I don't stop kicking and struggling but it's no use; there are at least four of them, and I'm taken out of the motel and thrown into a trunk. I count seven minutes before the car stops. I tense as I hear the car door open and shut, footsteps walk to the back of the car where I am. The trunk opens and I'm unceremoniously pulled out onto the ground, then I'm dragged inside a building. By the echoes and temperature, I assume it's a warehouse. The bag is pulled off my head, and the ties around my hands are cut. I was right, I'm in a warehouse. It's mostly empty except for a few piled boxes in the corners. No one else is here, I'm unrestrained - wow that's a tad bit overconfident of them - and I can hear footsteps coming.

"I see your tracking skills have improved."

THE demon walks through a door, making a beeline for me.

"Yes I tend to get determined when my family is viciously, unnecessarily murdered." I state coldly.

"Ah come on it was all good fun." he purrs, a playful smile stretching across his face.

It is a really good thing I can keep my cool, because I am seriously considering clawing this asshat's eyes out.

"Glad you thought it was fun."

He smiles even more, pacing around me.

"You had to know I was coming for you." he says, walking around behind me.

"Of course, you are very predictable you know."

"Really? What am I going to do next then?" he asks lightly.

"Logically speaking, you'll probably torture or kill me."

"Wrong. How do you feel about both?"

"Fantastic." I reply blandly.

I hear footsteps again; two sets, coming up behind me. I lash out and punch one of them right in the jaw. Of course I'm unarmed so it doesn't do much good. Though I can't say I regret doing it. They drag me off to a smaller room; they tie me to a chair.

"This is going to be even more fun than slitting your little sister's throat." he growls as his minions leave.

I can't say how long I was in there, probably not as long as it felt. I am cut, burned, shredded, and caused to hallucinate.

"I grow bored. Let's take a break." he says, I can hear his sick smile, though my eyes are closed.

I try to assess the damage, there's a long burn on my upper arm, bright red and angry looking. There's also gash on my thigh from where he slashed my leg with a serrated knife. Smaller burns and cuts coat my body, I can feel blood leak down from a gash on my forehead. I know I'm done. All I can hope is that Sam and Dean don't die trying to kill the demon. I close my eyes and try to detach myself from the pain.

_"Mommy I'm home!"_

_"Hey Ror! I made your favourite, peanut butter cookies!"_

_I run up and hug her around the waist. She hands me a cookie and I sit at the kitchen table where a glass of milk is already in place. Janie walks in, I give her half my cookie, she smiles and hugs me._

_"Rory! Rory I have to show you something!" she whispers excitedly._

_I follow her into the living room, and there on the couch, is Caden. And Caden is covered in magic marker; the drawings are really pretty and I tell Janie that. Caden is giggling his little baby giggles. Mommy comes in, she looks angry for a second but then she's laughing. Daddy hears us and comes downstairs._

_"Whoa!" he says, and again I think he's going to be mad, "Those are some beautiful flowers!" _

_I guess a four year old drawing on a two year old is probably normal so they didn't get mad. And daddy is right, they are really pretty flowers. Mommy says Janie will be an artist when she's older, me and Daddy agree. That night we watch Brother Bear and eat gummy worms. I want every day to be like this one. I love fun days, I love my family. Daddy carries me to bed, and he and Mommy tuck me in._

When I open my eyes, I don't see the comfort of my childhood bedroom. And it isn't my parents standing over me, it's Cas. He puts two fingers to my forehead and the pain disappears. Cas collapses to the ground; that's when I remember that he lost a lot of his strength when Heaven cut him off. That was another reason why he had had to gradually restore my memories.

"CAS!" Dean yells, running through the door landing on his knees next to Cas, "Ror go help Sammy!" he yells urgently.

As I leave I can hear him say "Cas you can't do this to me. Wake up!"

I see Sam, he's outnumbered; and he knows it. Even when I launch myself full speed into the fight, there are a lot of demons to fight. Don't expect a tearful "Yay! I'm not dead, Sam!" reunion, at least not yet. Can't really do that at the moment, as we're about to be killed. One of the demons lurches towards me; I kick her in the gut and tackle her, plunging the knife into her chest. Sam is on the ground; a demon holds a knife to his throat. I quickly, smoothly throw the knife at him; it catches him right in the back of the head. Sam looks shocked; I suppose I never did tell him I could throw knives. I quickly run over and yank the knife out, heading straight for another demon. Sam distracts him for a second, just long enough for me to bury the knife in the demons back. There are only two left, and they are easily taken care of. I might've forgotten to mention it, but me and Sam? Most badass fighting couple ever.

Sam grabs me and pulls me into a hug so tight I can barely breathe.

"I thought you were dead." He breathes into my hair.

"Almost but not quite." I reply, "You guys have some pretty good timing actually.

I hear something that sounds like a sob from the room where Dean and Cas are.

"Cas." is all I say as me and Sam head towards the room.

Dean is on the floor, he was obviously crying a moment ago. I see Cas breathing, just barely, but he's breathing.

"Dean…" Cas manages.

"Cas you're gonna be okay. You have to be okay." Dean says, his voice breaking.

"No he's not." says a voice from the entrance.

I jump back, knife at the ready; Sam does the same, as does Dean.

"Oh calm yourselves, I can save the angel." he says dismissively.

Dean looks shocked, then hopeful, then broken. He knows there's a catch, there's always a catch.

"I'll save him, but you have to leave me be." he states.

He knows we have no options, and it's obvious that Dean is desperate. But Dean won't do it unless I tell him it's okay.

"Do it. We'll leave you alone." I say firmly.

Everyone looks shocked, but I know I have to accept this. The demon steps forward and places a hand on Cas. Dean is still cradling the angel's head. Light fills the room. Why light? I thought only angels emitted light. He steps back as the light fades; Cas' breathing seems normal and he opens his eyes. He looks at the demon.

"Dumah? You?" Cas sputters in confusion.

"Wait you two know each other?!" Dean chimes in, trying to eliminate the confusion.

"He's my brother. He's an angel." Cas says, glaring at Dumah. "Why did you kill Aurora's family?" he asks with conviction.

"Ugh I was trying to pass off as a demon obviously. It's not like I was the first one of us to try and disguise ourselves."

"And you couldn't think of a less destructive, vicious method?" Sam asks, he's red with rage at the moment and I'm concerned he might explode.

"It was fast and it was easy. Oh and it was fun. Come on it wasn-"

An angel blade strikes him right in the heart; cutting off his sick monolog. I realize Dean had thrown it, enraged by everything this angel had caused.

Sam's draw drops; I stand there staring the angel that killed my family, and Cas looks torn between pride and pain.

"How did he possess you without your permission? Angels need consent." Sam asks.

"_Please somebody hear me. I miss being happy, I miss smiling and laughing. Please I just want to be happy." I plead._

"_I can help you." the man says soothingly._

"_But how? This is just a dream." _

"_All you have to do is say yes. Do that and you can be happy again."_

_I think about it for a minute. I reason that it's just a dream; what harm could it do?_

"_Yes."_

"I was tricked." I whisper so quietly I'm surprised anyone heard me.

"Well angels are tricky assholes." Dean says, "Not you Cas." He says when he sees Cas looking wounded.

Sam and I go back out to the main room. Sam stops us both and looks me right in the eyes. I think he's going to say something but instead he kisses me. It's a relieved kiss. A "Yay we're not dead" kiss.

"I'm really glad you guys pulled me out of that dull world I was in when I was in a coma." I say when we pull away.

He laughs and gives me another bone-crushing hug. We go back into the room and are not at all shocked by what we see. Dean and Cas are currently making out rather loudly.

"Well it's about damn time!" Sam yells mimicking what Dean had said to us a long time ago.

They break apart quickly and Dean stumbles for an explanation but gives up pretty fast.

"Yeah, yeah. I know you guys are shocked." Dean says as casually as possible.

Sam and I both burst out laughing at that statement, because honestly those two have passionate eye sex every day, no one is shocked.

They say you can't escape the hunter's life. And I know that to be completely true. But the only thing that makes it bearable is your family. Whether you chose them or they chose you. It's what matters in the end. I'll gladly live the hunter's life, as long as Sam, Dean, Cas, Kevin, and Charlie are there. We haven't seen them in a long time; I suppose that's where we're headed next. It's all good really, even though I'm not a huge believer in happy endings. Dean and Cas FINALLY got together - I mean come on that was frustrating to watch – me and Sam are together, we're all together as a family, oh and I almost forgot. The douchebag angel that killed my parents received an angel blade to the heart. All in all today was pretty satisfying.


End file.
